If you’re never quite reaching your weight loss goal, this post might help!
It feels like my whole life I’ve been trying to lose 5 pounds. Didn’t matter if my legs looked like sticks or if I had gained 20 pounds in 1 year.
My ideal weight was a number I had created in my mind without any real reference. Without any real vision of what this number will represent. The only vision I had was that if I reach that goal weight, my tummy will be flat, I will look like a short supermodel and I will live happily ever after.
For whatever reason, I never reached that goal weight and my belly never got flat. My weight changed during the years. My goal weight changed too. But the feeling inside me stayed – I never did enough to reach it.
Recently I had a huge realization.
I had read that one reason is how you don’t know how you want to feel when you reach that goal. You don’t know how you want to act when you reach it. And you don’t know what you’ll be doing, how you’ll behave, what you’ll experience once you reach that goal weight.
Mostly though, and this was the eye opening thought I had one morning: you’re probably afraid of becoming someone you don’t know.
A complete stranger – someone who simply is not you right now. Whether you’re perfect or imperfect, thin or overweight, good or bad – you know you.
And after all these years you’ve become the person who can’t lose weight. Just can’t get it together. The person who doesn’t have enough self-discipline and self-sabotages whenever she sees a tiny change in the right direction.
Losing weight and seeing your body change can be quite terrifying. You’re happy for a little bit, but then there’s this feeling. Oh, shoot, what if it actually happens?
So you self-sabotage, to find out whether you’re still the same.
The truth is: you will change in the process. You need to. But the good news is: reaching that weight loss goal is just a matter of being happy. Being the happiest person you can be in ANY given situation and scenario.
Of doing the right thing with joy. Weight loss is a side effect of living a joyful life.
And a joyful life is not something you achieve AFTER you’ve lost all the weight. It’s something you choose, everyday. It’s a choice – a choice of how you react to things, a choice of how you decide to live even when things don’t go as you’ve planned or imagined.
The one question to ask yourself
What you need here, what you have to choose here is who you want to become in the process. What do you want to learn and to experience?
The one question to ask yourself is this:
What would the best version of me do on a daily basis? How will I behave?
Describe every detail.
Because that’s exactly what you should be doing right now to reach your weight loss goal.
To become the person you want to be, and to achieve the goals you want to achieve – you need to act as the person you want to be, right now. You need to be that person already. Because once you get where you want to be you need to know how to stay there.
When you become that person, if you haven’t changed anything about yourself and your thinking – you won’t magically know how to react in sticky situations. The future you won’t all of a sudden know how to make the right choice. You need to learn, as much as you can along the way.
As hard as it is: Take this journey for what it is – a learning experience. Welcome every situation with curiosity, joy and willingness to do your best. When you fail or lose self-discipline, take it as a lesson – not as a failure that knocks you out for months. Learn, dust yourself off and go.
Now Take a Pen And Paper
As a little “home work”, take a pen and paper and write down the answers to these questions:
- Who are you going to be if you lose the weight?
- Is some essential part of you going to change?
- Would you have to compromize your values to lose the weight?
- What would the best version of you do on a daily basis?
- What do you want to learn during this journey?
- Is there a habit or a food you love right now that you’re afraid you’re never going to have again? Which one?
- Are you afraid that you’ll develop some qualities you dislike in others? Which ones?
Find out what’s stopping you and when the time for self-sabotage comes, remind yourself of the answers and know that you’ve got this.